Parental...support?

I am a mom first.

And that has made some aspects of my life hard as of late.

I want to eventually get a job in my community, and because of this, I am very concerned about my reputation.

I should say at this point that I have a very G rated life. Very. So I'm not in anyway referring to my personal life.

I am referring, rather, to my interaction with my children's teachers and other school administrators.

Where is the line between being the mom and being the future teacher?

For example, last winter I got into a car accident in the parent pick-up line after complaining several times about the accumulation of ice on this school's roads. Fortunately, no one was hurt. It did, however, cost several hundred dollars to fix my car. I was told by several people that I should have gotten the police involved and made a case to have the school system pay for my damages. Instead, I sucked it up, preferring not to make trouble. I do, afterall, want these people to hire me in a couple of years.

This year, I have had some concerns about my son's classroom environment. Not because he has a bad teacher. Quite the opposite. My kids have been blessed with wonderful teachers, all of whom I have liked very much. I am only concerned because my son is on the immature side and the youngest in his class. He is a SWEET SWEET boy, but he is pesky; and I'll be the first to admit it. So when he is denied snack or the use of his blanket at nap time, it makes me wonder if those decisions are based in love or frustration.

But where do I go with these thoughts? I have addressed some concerns in the past but always felt the need to apologize profusely. It's like the power is not in my hands. And it needs to be. For me. For my child.

I am glad I am a mother who wants to be a teacher. I think it will give me a better sense of how I should approach parents and solicit help from them.

But I have been thinking...is parental "support" the right term?

When I get letters home that say, "homework page 3 (or whatever else), thanks for your support," I want to say...

"No, thank you for YOUR support. I am my children's mother. They are my children. You are helping me. It's not the other way around."

Perhaps I am thinking too much about this, but I think there is a line here. It's not okay to assume that parents will ONLY help their children if educators ask them to. It's not okay to assume that educators care more about the education of their students than their own parents.

I have also gotten newsletters sent home that are slightly condescending. Writing in all caps: NO LUNCH BOXES WHATSOEVER (for a field trip) seems a little unnecessary. I know that teachers are getting less and less parental support, and this could not come at a worse time with the accountability issues presented in NCLB; but I think parents should still be treated as equals...no, they should be treated as the PARENTS. With dignity. With respect. And certainly not as imbeciles. If a child is doing poorly in school, it should NOT be assumed that the parent is not doing everything she can to help her child or that she simply doesn't care.

Educators support a parent's efforts to raise happy, functioning members of society. It's not the other way around.